What makes a rite of passage complete is community recognition.
-Rachelle Garcia Seliga
After years working as a family therapist, it wasn’t until I started my own family that I truly discovered and understood that women and birthing people are falling through the cracks. That so many new families are left alone to navigate a time of immense transformation that was once held and supported by communities of care.
For all the physical challenges that can accompany the postpartum time, it was the psychological and emotional challenges that stood out most in my own transition to motherhood– a transition marked by anxiety, anger, and deep depression. I felt that after the expansive act of birthing my daughter, I didn’t know how to contract back into myself again. Sure I was exhausted from all night feedings and raw from birth and breastfeeding, but I was also heavy with grief. I felt so clearly that the person I had been was gone. Certainly the lifestyle and freedom she enjoyed was gone. I felt as though a part of me had died, and that no one around me could, or would, acknowledge that death. The labor of my own rebirth as a mother had stalled.
After a lot of healing work and learning about the postpartum window, I now understand that new mothers actually require the calm presence of others to help regulate their precious nervous systems, and by extension, help integrate a new identity with all its privileges and responsibilities. We have been leaving women and birthing folks in an incomplete phase of their rite of passage into motherhood. I am honored to help women complete this rite of passage, and come out on the other side feeling more confident, reassured, validated–even triumphant!
I offer baby friendly sessions in my office located in old town Longmont and telehealth for those who feel best doing therapy from home. I am also honored to offer in-home support, if needed or desired, for birthing folks in their first six months postpartum.